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**Kyra Ayres is one of our former Diglossos members who is on hiatus, but we keep her articles in fond memory and in hopes of her return soon.  Don’t worry.  We will forward any comments you have to her.**

 

The Whitsundays, Australia

How do you describe the most amazingly beautiful, breathtaking and serene place in the world?  And that by far is the understatement of a lifetime.

The Whitsundays in Queensland Australia… Never before in my life have I seen such simple beauty.  Everywhere I looked, everywhere I turned just beauty here and beauty there.  It was overwhelming; my body felt as though it was in sensory overload!  My jaw dropped to the ground, I was weak in the knees, my hands started shaking, my heart fluttering, pounding… as if I had fallen in love for the very first time.  I wanted to cry it was just so beautiful.  As crazy as it sounds and all in a moment, I felt as though I had finally found the love of my life and my spiritual homeland.

Let me explain.

I flew to the Whitsunday’s from Brisbane and I’ll never forget the flight over.  I had a window seat and my face was pressed to the window like a 3 year old child.  I had never seen such crystal blue waters and islands all just floating around within a sky that complimented that blue so well.   Like they planned on wearing the same color outfit that day, they coordinated perfectly.  They were both so pure and so blue that I swear I could not tell where the ocean stopped and the sky began.  It was just that beautiful.  Tears came down, I felt so grateful to be sitting there and for my eyes to be witnessing the amazing Great Barrier Reef.

I landed into Proserpine airport and boarded a bus, a coach that transferred all of us to our respective hotels.  Something was in that air, what I can never define but what I could feel from the moment I stepped outside the plane and what I don’t think will ever leave me.  We pulled up to my hotel and I settled into the Coral Sea Resort.  It was an exclusive, luxury resort, the ones where fairy tale weddings are made and where I somehow managed to find myself the deal of a lifetime at just over a $100 a night.  If heaven had a price tag, they certainly under charged!  I settled into my room and immediately checked out the property which was located on the water along the Whitsunday passage.  The pool overlooked the Coral Sea so depending on where you were situated, you couldn’t tell the difference between the two, the pool just looked like it never ended.  I then wandered over to the concierge and asked her what would be best for a young single female traveler like myself to do for activities.  “You have to do this sailing trip to Whitehaven Beach, on the Ragamuffin”… I had heard that Whitehaven beach was gorgeous, filled completely with pure white silica sand surrounded by aqua blue water.  Intrigued, I signed up and one could say my life had changed from that very moment on but at the risk of sounding even more cliché then I already do, I will not say that.

That night, I enjoyed myself at the hotel where they were performing a tropical show with Polynesian firedancers that called me up to the stage as part of their performance.   I met an old couple that lived right outside of Sydney who had one of those deliciously romantic love stories about how they met in Europe by chance and fell in love.  She was American and he was Australian… she left her life in the states and followed her love to Australia, never regretting a single decision or a moment.  They treated me like their own for the night and told me all about their history and life in Australia.  It was a lovely evening!  We bid our sweet adieus and to the Ragamuffin I went the next morning never expecting what was in store for me but welcoming it all like arms that have been outstretched for so long just waiting for this very moment.  The very next morning, the Ragamuffins team came to my hotel and met me with their tour bus to take me to the departure slip at Shute Harbour where the sailboat would be leaving.

*****

I saw him on the boat, he was part of the crew which included the captain, 2 ship/deck hands and an administrative type who gave us drinks and made us feel comfortable.  I hated the ride at first:  The sailboat was smaller than I had expected, it was windy and the waves were choppy, crashing against the side and wetting us passengers constantly.  We kept moving around from side to side to avoid the splashes, but to no avail.  Miserable, nauseas and wet, I went to sit by the captain and this worker, the male of the crew who asked me if I was okay.  I grudgingly told him I was “Just Fine”, hating the experience, waiting for the moment when I was back to land and steady ground.  After an hour and a half, we arrived at Whitehaven Beach and took a raft from the sailboat to the white sand… the most beautiful beach I’ve ever seen with sand as white as the clouds.  Sand so soft and silky smooth, it slid right through your fingertips and toes like I envision clouds would.  I sighed and felt such peace.

He fancied me; I didn’t realize it until I was getting my vodka lemonade from the lunch area they set up on the beach to calm my nerves.  He wanted to know more about me; where was I from, what did I do for a living, what brought me here, all of which I gladly told.   He asked me what my hobbies were and I told him I like to drink, live and be happy.  That’s always a way to break the ice – just lay it all out there in simplicity!  He followed me to my place in the sand and told me jokes.  Little Johnny jokes which for the life of me I can’t remember but at the time thought were hysterical.  I smoked a cigarette and he told me they were bad for me but here’s a can to place my ashes.  Such a gentleman.  Then it was time to go back to the sailboat (we only had about 2 hours to actually enjoy the beach, something the tour guides never really tell you on the brochure)- he helped me back on the raft and sat next to me on the ride back to Shute Harbour to point out the sites.  “Look over here, past the blue and to that island – that’s where George Harrison lived.”

The view from the sailboat was indescribable.  All that blue, islands here and there, how can you put that beauty into words?  This amazing little world of its own comprised of 74 islands, each with its own allure and glorious quality.  He wanted to show me more and gave me his number so we could spend the night together, which we did.  The most perfect night in my life.  We met at the lagoon of Airlie Beach (gateway to the Whitsunday Islands) which was right down the road from my hotel.  He made us something, tequila and ginger, and we sat in the sand, looked at the stars and drank together.  “Take my hand, let me show you how beautiful it is here.”  We walked around this serene perfection and he pointed out the things he was so proud of that this beach represented.  He took me to dinner and made me try octopus; and when I naturally denied, he told me to embrace this moment as a first time.  How this trip of mine was about first times and that he would never steer me wrong.  And he was right.  By the way, the octopus wasn’t so bad. 

We strolled along the beach again after dinner and watched the Firedancers practice for their shows.  He kissed me and I hesitated; I couldn’t expect it but I enjoyed it and for a moment there, I lost myself. I let myself completely slip away. He brushed the hair away from my face and we sat in the sand watching the Firedancers twirl their long sticks aflame round and round.  He showed me the constellations, Scorpio and more, different than the ones we have in the Northern Hemisphere.  He held my hand and guided me, pointing out the little landmarks that were special to Airlie Beach around the lagoon.  I couldn’t resist his smile, his face, his attitude of no worries cause truly there was nothing to fear in that moment with him, in that land, on that island.  No one had anything to fear and it showed in every action, in every word, in every step.  We laid together on a slide for what seemed like hours as the rain drizzled down, with no cares but the stars in an enormously clear sky.  He took me down the main strip where we went to the backpacker bars likes Beaches.  We sang along with the music, drank some more, kissed and laughed and kissed again.  We sang to Mr. Jones and The Killers, intertwined our hands, took pictures, looked into each other’s eyes and smiled that goofy kind of grin you never even know you’re doing.

I woke up the next morning in a blissful haze and felt so far from where I’ve ever been.  I somehow managed to float out of bed and downstairs to the outside restaurant where I enjoyed an amazing continental breakfast in the dining area of the hotel overlooking the Coral Sea.  He texted me throughout the day, little notes here and there, to make sure I was enjoying the islands.  “Make sure you go to Daydream and Hamilton!” and I did.  Breathtaking beauty so poised and peaceful that I’m sure it was the pure meaning of tranquility.  I went parasailing for the first time and sailed above what looked like the heavens down below or maybe I was in them in that moment and the night before… I’m pretty sure I was there in both.

I met him again that evening and thought to myself that this should be a lifelong thing, but I’ll take it if only for my right now.  At least I would have felt it, for when morning comes this night will be over and this will have to be the most sacred memory I could ever possess.  I imagine it would be one of the few I remember when I’m 90 years old and looking back on those very few, very precious moments of my life when I was moved beyond comprehension and at perfect contentment with myself and the world.

The next morning the alarm clock rang at 4am and pierced my ears like a bee sting I was allergic to.  It was time for me to leave.  He drove me to the ferry at Shute Harbour and we bade our farewells in the morning as it rained the way it hasn’t in the Whitsundays in so long.  He wanted me to stay but I refused to let myself fall for the moment, jaded by all my moments before in a time that seemed so long ago.  I wanted to be the strong girl from New York City with the itinerary I planned so long for.   I wanted him to be the Australian that swept me away in that amazing world of blue that I fell in love with, even if only for a night or two, and I wanted to leave that there so precious and sacred.

But the best things in life you never plan for and foolishly I left.  He walked me to the ferry and I boarded after a sweet and loving embrace.   I looked out the window of the Fantasea, the rain falling down the way a single tear rolled softly down my face.   I didn’t want him and that perfection to be held in sadness.  So I let the ferry take me to where my itinerary said I must go on the outside, and wept like a child inside.   And I said goodbye to my pure sweet blue… I must let you go for now and vowed my eyes would get to see you once again.  I left my heart there in the Whitsundays.  I did not want to take it with me for I knew it would be safe nestled gently within the arms of the islands.  And I knew I would come back for it, and maybe him… someday.

*****

It was a Monday that day I left the Whitsundays.   It was a rainy Monday and the further the ferry took me away, the further I could distance myself mentally, emotionally, most certainly physically.  At the airport I fell right back in step with my empowered, independent self and boarded my plane to Cairns, excited to be visiting yet another new and unexplored territory.  A place comprised of little historic villages in the heart of rainforests and adrenaline rushing temptations like bungee jumping and skydiving.  I pushed any thought or buggering sense of regret I may have had of leaving the first place in the world that ever truly made me feel alive.  I pushed it deep, deep down, closed my eyes and embraced my new experience.

I stepped off the plane and onto the tarmac and set off via taxi to my hotel which was the Holiday Inn on the beautiful esplanade of Cairns.  One thing I will say about the Holiday Inn’s when traveling abroad is that they are at a much higher standard and star rating then the ones in the USA.  Each one I saw or stayed in was at least a 4 star with amenities and accommodations rivaling closely to a 5 star.

Cairns is an amazing little city, and by little I mean bigger and more touristy then the Whitsundays, but charming with its tropical northern feel and allure.  A sound familiar yet startling puts me back in step.  It’s a text message on my Vodafone cell phone…  “How was your flight, how is my lovely enjoying her new city?”  I smile and blush in the same moment, in an embarrassing way that teenagers do when they lock eyes with their crush and feel the first time of flip flops in their heart.   I was doing just fine, my sweet Aussie love, wishing you were with me… but just fine.  “Wishing I was with you too, wishing you were right here with me.”  Yeah… it was regrettably hard, deliciously romantic and I loved every second of it.

I powered on and made arrangements with the concierge at my hotel for each of the activities I wanted to do.  For starters and first on my agenda, I wanted to visit the Kuranda, a village located within the depths and heart of the rainforest.   Its location northwest of Cairns meant taking the skyrail through and above the mountains and rainforest, a site which proved to be a jaw dropping and mind boggling experience.  We traveled miles and miles upwards passing through the Australian jungle until we reached our destination.  This is a world heritage site with true aboriginal settlers and Australian wildlife with of course your not so friendly crocodiles making several appearances!  It was a truly amazing experience.

Part of my agenda, as an “add-on” included horseback riding at a local horse farm in Kuranda.  The sweetest people I might have ever met, I laughed and joked with my instructor as he took me through the trails.  He told me to follow my dreams and follow my heart and if that’s here in Australia, then I owe it to myself to find a way to stay here.  He then offered me a job on his farm taking care of the horses which I would of, could have, and sometimes feel I should have taken.  But time is a funny thing and sometimes you don’t realize an opportunity when it’s set out right before you.   Would I have been happy working on a farm, getting dirty, taking care of animals and working outdoors all day?  I don’t know, but for all the reasons I told myself “no” then, I can easily tell myself “yes” now.

If I wondered whether or not my potential could be reached by doing such a mundane task, well I ask myself the same question now at the job I’ve had here in NYC.   And as quickly as I may have reasoned then that Cairns (or the Kuranda) was not where my heart was and therefore I shouldn’t relocate, is as quickly as I can say now, damn the Kuranda is so much closer to my heart (the Whitsundays) then New York City can ever be.  After all, positioning oneself is everything.  So many opportunities, but I was young and naive.   Take advantage of the cards you are dealt and make the most of what it is, is what I would tell myself then.  Yes, time is a very funny thing.

But I digress….

The next day was yet another amazing life altering experience.  Walking along the amazing esplanade in the morning, gazing out to the ocean that encompassed the Great Barrier Reef down below, I walked by a tourist stand which I wandered curiously into.  A pamphlet out of the corner of my eye drew my attention.  “Experience the most amazing views of the rainforests and Great Barrier Reef like no other tour can allow – skydiving from 14,000ft above!”  Acting on a whim, I signed up.

In fear of not capturing the moment it deserves from memory alone, here is the passage from my journal immediately afterwards:

Another amazing day.  I jumped out of the tiniest plane over the rainforests and the Great Barrier Reef!  It was indescribable!  So magnificent!  I felt like I was above the world, like I was a part of the sky just soaring.  I was flying in the air in Australia!  God it was amazing!  I always wanted to do it and I finally did!  I just can’t put it into words, the feeling right outside the door of a plane, right before you fall.  You come to terms with everything in your life and it doesn’t make any sense at all but it does!  The perspective!   Everything else in comparison seems so insignificant.  All the little things melt away and life becomes so real and precious.  My life, my beautiful life!  I’ve never felt this grateful before for anything, but here and now, I am grateful for the smallest and biggest gift of it all, existence.  And I will make the most of mine.

Based on this passage, the next decision was simple and almost immediately made.  This trip of mine was not about following an itinerary.  It wasn’t about planning next steps before even stepping foot there.  It was about acting once I arrive in a place I may never be blessed enough to see again.  So what do I want to do today?  Where do I want to be tomorrow?  Those are the questions I need to be asking myself!  And if by fate, that familiar sound rang from my pocket sending shivers and sensations down my spine the way not even skydiving above the land I long to live in can.  It was a text message and without looking down, I immediately knew my next move.  My heart was beckoning me and this time I didn’t push it down and shove it aside.  I listened.

With 4 days left within my dream, MY LIFE, I decided to break my rules, disregard my itinerary and go back to the place that stole my heart away.  The Whitsundays – Airlie Beach.  My dear sweet Airlie.  All that blue, all that beauty, that glory, I wanted it to be mine again and I was going to soak it up like I never had anything else before in my life.  And I did.  I went online and booked the next flight out of Cairns and back to the Whitsundays like it was the easiest thing I’ve ever had to do.  I called my beau and told him of my decision and his words I can never forget.  He said, “You’ve just made my day, my lovely!  Thank you!  Now please come home and I’ll make you that barbie I promised you love.”  The pieces fell right into place and the next morning, I took the first flight out.  From then on, the magic really happened.  And that text message from earlier that I never looked at until much later?  It said “Missing you more than anything my lovely.”

In a state of pure bliss driven by the power of confident decisiveness, I traveled to the airport the next morning.  Energized by anticipation, blood was pumping violently in my veins and through my heart.  The blue surrounding the windows, engulfing my every view, I sat back, looked out and embraced it.  This is where I’m meant to be.  This is a part of who I am!  How do you voice or express that?  It’s like a surge of immense light within yourself that becomes aflame with such overwhelming positivity, it’s almost enlightening.

And as the plane landed finally on the runway of Hamilton Island in the Whitsundays, as silly as it sounds, I knew I was home.  How that could be after visiting only once before, I do not know…but you know when you experience something, someplace where you just feel at ease, at peace, and know immediately that you were supposed to be there?   Like you had been there before and have some special unexplainable connection?  That is how I felt from the first flight I took from Brisbane a week before, looking out the window with tears streaming down, mesmerized from the beauty.  I could never give a factual, solid reasoning as to why.  I had no ties there before.  Heck no one in my family had even left the United States before me.  But I was home there, in all of Australia really, but here in the Whitsundays, I felt like I was completing a piece of me that had been missing.  A part that I could never understand that just always felt empty, here in a strange land, by myself, with no one I know, with nothing familiar, I finally felt complete.  Strange how that works.

I landed around 1pm that afternoon and spent the day at Daydream Island just soaking up the sun, enjoying the scenery, waiting for my love to meet me at Shute Harbour after work for the highly anticipated reunion.  Butterflies were building up in my stomach, I was so excited and after swearing to myself not 3 days before that I would leave this place and never indulge in the thought of it again… to be there, almost right back to the missing piece of my puzzle, was exhilaratingly scary.  Yet I’ve never felt so right about anything else as I did in that moment.

I met another Australian gentleman who was in Airlie for the boat show taking place the following weekend, as I waited.  A wonderfully charismatic man, he invited me on his boat to enjoy the evening and sunset to which I declined just as my phone rang, my Aussie had finally arrived!  I ran towards the parking lot and he greeted me at his car, held my hands, took my face and kissed me gently, saying “Thank you for coming back to me”.  We embraced for moments and then jumped into his car and headed out towards Proserpine to Woolworth’s, kind of like our American version of Pathmark or Shoprite, to pick up food for the Barbie.   We talked about his day and mine; a contractor during the week and a sailor on weekends, he had many stories to tell.

But before another single word was spoken, he squeezed my hand tighter, looked at me and said “I need you to see something”… and he drove me up an isolated cliff right before we hit Airlie but after Shute Harbour… to the very top of this mountainous side were the most amazing panoramic views of the area.  Breathtaking, stunning, gorgeous barely described what my eyes were seeing – where this land was so precious it of course was being claimed for future residential building (obviously for millionaires).  “I want you to remember Airlie, not for her tourist spots, but for her rare and simple beauty.”   I won’t ever forget…

He took me to his place outside of Proserpine, in the true Australian outback.  We drove for many miles through the trees and countryside where the dirt roads were barely visible and kangaroos might as well been giving directions amongst the trees.  The air was so clean and fresh, so pure and simple.  I asked him on the car ride over, to prepare me for what I should expect cause sincerely I had no idea.  He said “Oh nothing too out of the ordinary my lovely, except the bathroom is outside on the deck”.  I laughed.  I thought he was kidding…. I later came to find out this was not the case.

He made me the best kangaroo steak I’ll probably ever eat in my life on that Barbie and afterwards we sat in his backyard, looked up at the stars which were beyond magnificent.  You didn’t need any man made lights here in this wilderness of perfection.  You had nature lighting the way.  Physically, mentally… the path was lit and maybe will always be lit for me there.

I tried to take pictures of the immense beauty, of all the stars that I would never be able to describe to my life back in the states, but to no avail.  He held my hand and we looked up at the stars and the sky in the Southern Hemisphere.  I would have done anything in that moment, given anything that I could have to stay there forever.  But that’s not how life works.  Instead we retreated back inside to his bedroom, held each other tightly, as though it was an everyday thing but knowing it was the last day we could.  Wrap me in your dolphin blanket, I am fearless, I am stumbling in a glorious void of warmth and perfection, a simple security of immense proportions.

In moments where there is a warmth beside you, an arm outstretched, holding, with the safety of a security blanket over your entire body and you are miles and miles away from anything that you could have ever known before.  Yet right now it seems so simple, it makes sense, in a way life never has before.  And in this moment of security, all that can be heard is the laughter from miles and miles away, when its midnight and I have to go outside to the bathroom… where you awake sleepily when I tap you and say “Go run along then” and I playfully whack you and you get out of bed, hold my hand, turn the light on for me, tinkle on a tree and wait for me, until I’m ready to return to our warmth…  and to the flight that inevitably awaits me to what I can only perceive, but never feel, is my home.  “Please don’t leave me”, he murmured to me, in our own bed and life of warmth.  “Please don’t ever forget me” he said longingly in my ear…

I left my heart there, with you, to prove I never would.  Click my heels three times, I swear if I put all my hear t in that longing I could get right back to you there… but moments never remain the same.  How sad it is to think that may be the only time in my life when I have such completion.

© 2009, Kyra Ayres

***If you want to read more from Kyra about her trip to the Whitsundays, you can catch up on her original adventures in this section on the next couple of pages.  Enjoy!!

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